Monday, May 15, 2017

Never Mind The Dinosaurs

Never mind The Dinosaurs (*note: this doesn't just apply to autistic people)

Autistic people don't just speak in one language, they just try to talk in whatever language they have to talk in, to get by in that scenario. To communicate effectively in a way that suits the nature of the setting. It's called adapting, or having to find ways to adapt, when it doesn't come naturally.
One who calls that "manipulative" or deems it sinister in some way is as ignorant as your great aunt is about being gluten free for Christmas dinner. So, will you go to her house to be polite, eat it, and suffer later? Last two Christmases I turned down such invites. It wasn't worth my being sick...
Yeah, I took flack for it. People got offended and made my problem and my boundary about themselves. But oh well. Those are my boundaries. Sorry, I can't and won't attend a meal that'll make me sick. You don't think I require adjustments to it when the fact is that I do? Sorry, I can't come. Not coming. I'm not hurting myself to make you feel more comfortable. Same goes with autism stuff. I can do my best and be me, and if that isn't enough for you, see ya. It's not worth my precious time and energy.
Unaccepting people, who are too starchy to be open to objective, new concepts, must be stood up to once, and then ignored forever more. They're dinosaurs...and the ice age is approaching.
Hasta la vista baby.
So, to all of us autistic folks, medical "zebra/unicorns" (rare/complex illness) and the like:

Never mind the dinosaurs. Never accept their projections of you, get defensive and angry. It hurts you, and it almost starts start pseudo-proving their point, because that's the cycle of the gaslighting effect - but don't kill yourself defending yourself either. Facts are facts. Truth is truth. You know your truth.

 Take it from someone who tried both ways and only got hurt bad. But no more. I now have a sense of self dignity and this is what I'll #riseabove with.
Hard to do? Yes. It's hard to find the balance and to rise above. But here: Keep firm but keep your cool. State facts in 5 minutes or under. Walk away. Don't look back. The rest is their sh*t.

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